Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Orientation Last Night:

Thoughts on Orientation:
Last night went well but I have to be honest, orientation scared me.  Five couples and one single hopeful parent were there last night and my tummy was in total knots.  Not to mention I rushed right after work and Jose was running a tad late because he had to go check in on Lola.  First impressions are a must in this case but when I got to the Unitarian Church (where they held orientation) I felt tired and I must have looked it too because the lady running the show offered me some coffee.  I immediately thought “I picked the wrong day to start working out again”.  I sat down and got super nervous.  Everybody was talking about the children they already had and other couples were talking about their day, then there was me with my huge gym bag addicted to looking at my phone wondering where Jose is.  He is my calming down stabilizer and he was nowhere to be found.  Well luckily he walked in right before they shut the door.   Deep breath and here we go!

Now about the information:
The Children:
So much to talk about and only two hours to do it in;
What kind of home they could possibly come from and why?
Answer:  They can come from anywhere and anything could have happened to them.  There was no specific child she spoke about it was all generally speaking.
The stories broke my heart and it was hard to hear (for some reason the older I get the more sensitive I get).  Children could be in foster care from birth all the way to 18 years old and then they are sent out to the world alone.  Scary?  I think so. I can’t imagine that, so hard to believe that is the actual reality for so many children.

The Process:
So this is when I got a bit discouraged.  They went through step by step but they quickly told us that we need to have the room ready before the process even starts.  Even before our interview.  So I quickly looked at Jose because we don’t have two bedrooms.  We only have one.  I wish we could at least be interviewed first.  So we don’t know when we will be able to move.  We are very picky about locations but it seems that we are going to really have to figure it out sooner than later.  Jose wants to move around the summer time and of course I want to start looking like “yesterday”.  So hearing about the apartment really set us back time wise.

The options:
There are so many kids out there waiting for homes I don’t think that process will be long at all for us, once we get there.  They told us the more open we are, the easier it will be to find a child for us.  We are very open, we would like a child anywhere from 0 – 8 or 9.  It just really depends on the child and the connection. 

My final thoughts: 
I was discouraged last night for sure but I woke up this morning with a new outlook and we will tackle this.  We will be able to get through this even though it won’t be when I was hoping too.  I do have the attitude when I want something done I do my best to get it done then.  Jose told me I should slow down and it will happen when it’s supposed too.  I agree with Jose but every day that goes by is a day I get older.  I want to be able to be as active as possible with them every day.  So I just need to take a couple deep breaths and we will take the next step.

Look for an apartment.


  1. Keep going, and when you get discouraged... keep going more! I aged out of the foster-care system in 1995... for all the years I spent there, I longed for an adoptive family.

    People who say that "gay's shouldn't raise children" are obviously ignorant people who never had to live without a "forever family."

    Keep moving forward, and share the love you obviously are so generous to want to share!

    Safe journey,


  2. Thank you so much Rebecca, your story is so touching. You just pushed me into overdrive and reconfirmed that this is the right decision.

  3. Rebecca - on another note I notice you're from Gig Harbor. I went the last few years of High School in Sequim. :)
    Small world.